What are you afraid of?

What are you afraid of?
This is not the typical "get over it and just do it" mantra that we hear so often. This is not the "what are you afraid of" that taunts us as youngsters. This is the real honest question. What is the real fear that is keeping you from doing what you really want to be doing? I have been giving a lot of attention to this particular topic of late...its a fine line between giving something too much energy, thereby just stewing on it, and giving it enough attention to DO something about it.

Fear does not just stop. Some would say it needs to be conquered, others say embraced - but which ever way you think about it, the possibility of responding to it rather than reacting to it exists. I am in the middle of it right now. I find myself to be rather influenced by my fears - to the point of in-action - and I guess that is part of my whole point here. In order to fully respond to the fears that are holding me, I feel that I need to understand the fear better. I do not, at this point, appear to be a person that can simply go out and do it in spite of my fears. I truly wish that I could, but I have not really been able to, up to this point at least.

So I strive for understanding, in the hope that through my understanding, the path will make itself more clear.

Chop Wood, Carry Water.

Meditation, prayer, quite time; call it whatever you want to. We all need time to focus. A friend recently reminded me of the zen proverb "Before enlightenment, chop wood, carry water. After enlightenment, chop wood, carry water." Basically how do we find the peace and beauty in the rituals and routines of our daily lives? Chop wood. Carry water.

For me, it is a 3 to 4 mile walk pretty much every morning. Rain? Snow? Wind? Cold? No problem. The views of the Boulder Flatirons help (as does the 20oz cup of coffee) but the practice of being outside for 45 minutes a day just enjoying and appreciating the beauty of the day was a practice I started before we moved to Boulder - and believe me, there aren't any Flatirons in Wadena, MN. Chop Wood. Carry Water.

The reminder of the proverb is more special, more poignant for me, because my mentor, the late Bill Sauer, used the same proberb fairly often. I had allowed myself to forget the proverb, if not the practice. We need to learn how to find peace in our day. The stresses of our daily lives in the early 21st century invade everything. Traffic, stock market, kids, parents, jobs, neighbors - you name it, it just keeps piling on. Take the time to appreciate the peace and beauty in your every day experiences. De-compress, if just for 3 minutes at a time. Chop Wood. Carry Water.

A recommendation:

I'm starting to figure this out (yeah, right). The challenge de jour is the attempt to determine what it is you actually want from life, as opposed to what you are supposed to want. It is a lot trickier than it sounds...
A social networking friend named Chris Landry recently turned me on to a guy named Chris Guillebeau and his e-book called A Brief Guide to World Domination. This 29 page ditty is not for everyone - but if you are not quite satisfied with where you are or what you are doing, then I heartily recommend it. Actually, even if you are completely happy with what you are accomplishing in your life I recommend the read. As you all know I am a big fan of expanded horizons and if you let him, Chris will definately expand your horizons.

The Big Black Hole

Wow. August. I have fallen into the black hole of blogging. As is very apparent from reading though the last posts, I have fallen into the trap of blogging when I feel inspired to blog, and letting myself off the hook otherwise. I suppose this isn't really that bad - part of the reason for the blogging in the first place is to clarify my thoughts and fill my cup, so if I don't need it, then what the heck.

Here's the thing though. Some people out there are inspiring me to do more...to do better. Chris Brogan, Seth Godin and others make you sit down and think. I'm at a point where I am trying to make sense of my professional life - as in "what the heck do I want to do when I grow up?" This is sort of strange ground for me in the blogosphere, because I have really tried to post stuff that might be helpful to other people who are in this boat with me. I really don't want to fall into the narcissistic rut of talking about my life out of the context of useful or helpful ideas and suggestions. I haven't been feeling very useful of late.

So with ALL of that preamble, here is the useful bit; it's ok. I have the tendency to be very hard on myself when I don't do all of the things that I feel I should. It's ok. Cut yourself some slack. We all go through periods in our lives when we are feeling less than insprired; less than committed. I believe it is in the nature of being human. Work hard. Be committed. And on the days when it just isn't there, don't dwell on it. It goes along with the non-judging theme that I have talked a lot about. I am where I am - so how do we go ahead from here?

So in the spirit of going ahead from here, I am going to resolve to come up with one helpful thing per week (or more) it might just be a link - or a sentence. It might be a two-page manifesto. My commitment to myself is that I will publish. Period.

I hope that you will find it useful, or helpful.