Tuesday, December 30, 2008

Vision

I have never been good at setting goals. They just seem to "out there" for me. I know that they are important, largely because goals create the roadmap for action, but I have never been able to get my head around doing them.

As I have been pondering my current circumstances, along with the fact that the New Year is upon us I came to a blindingly obvious realization. I don't really like goals...but I DO like telling stories. I am an avocational actor - or at least I was - I understand the idea of creating an environment in which a character can thrive. Many, many moons ago Bill Sauer (yup, there he is again) led the Sr. leadership team at Homecrest in a visioning exercise. The idea was to create a picture of what we wanted the company to be. Now, I will fully admit that in this particular instance it didn't work out quite like any of us had envisioned, but I really think that the practice is still incredibly valid - and for me it is a lot less formal and intimidating that the ever present "goal setting."

It is a pretty interesting and simple process: Find a quiet spot to sit without distractions. If music helps you to relax, that's fine - but it should be very background and very non-intrusive. Adagio is actually proven to be the most relaxing. Set a pen and paper next to you - don't touch it, you don't need it yet.

Ok, now, sit down and close your eyes. Now simply picture what you would like your life or your job to look like. Maybe it is something as simple as picturing what your life would look like if you were happier at work or if you lost 10 or 20 pounds. Play make-believe. Imagine all of the details of what is the same and what is different. How do you act differently? What do you DO differently in your mind's eye?

Now, open your eyes and pick up the pen and paper. All that you do at this point is to describe, in writing, what was in your mind. Just tell the story of what your world looked like. The process of writing it down locks it into your brain. Be sure to capture as much detail as you can. The details are important. Write about what you saw and how you felt in the new imagined place. Nothing is too small or unimportant to make note of - in fact the smaller the better.

Once you have finished, give a good stretch and stand up. Now, with the picture of what is possible firmly in your mind...act as if it were true. You have your "goal" it is the picture in your head. You also have the means to achieve it. Just behave as though you already have it!
How would you act differently if you were 20 pounds lighter? Act that way. How would your home life be different if you loved your job? Consiously BE that way when you are home.

Did your picture include laying on the couch in front of the TV with no energy and cranky? I'm guessing not. So DON'T DO THAT. It really is just about re-imaging yourself.

Keep the picture of where you want to be firmly in your mind, and then just take little steps to get there. That is why I want you to imagine the small details...they are easier to change. Once the change begins, it is easier to continue. Go back to that place in your mind frequently. Remind yourself of what it felt like and looked like. Re-read the description if it helps.

Give it a try - it seems to work better for me than the austere "goal setting."

Have a happy and safe New Year and I'll be back in '09!

Saturday, December 27, 2008

Painting the Cow

The title is a reference to Seth Godin's book Purple Cow. The nutshell of the book is that to succeed, you need to be remarkable. Nobody really even notices cows...but if there were a PURPLE cow - now THAT people would notice.

But what if your cow is just a plain brown-and-white cow? Then what? Well, I'm trying to figure out how to get a bucket of purple paint and Paint My Cow.

Right now, I'm working with a pretty successful cow. This cow is regularly making money - has some left over at the end of the year...even THIS year. I'm not sure the cow is of the cash variety, but it certainly has the potential. Thing is, this cow is really just your run-of-the-mill brown-and-white cow.

So how do we go about painting this cow? How do we transform the business from ordinary to remarkable?

You need to open your eyes. Look at what the competition is, and isn't, doing. Talk to your target customers. Find out what they want, and then figure out how to give it to them in a remarkable way. For me right now that means getting into the mind of the interior designer and finding out what really motivates them. Brands? Profit opportunity? Simplicity? Selection? The answer is that it is probably a mix of all of these things.

So I have two things to do:

First, solicit input from a cross section of interior designers. Email inquiries work. Buying them lunch works better. Once I get some momentum, then I try to get 6 or 7 of them in a room together to try and build some energy around what works for them.

The second thing that I have to do is to work on ways to give them what they are asking for in a way that they will think of ME before they think of someone else. But I can't do the second part until I do the first. I might develop a GREAT white-glove delivery service, but if what they care about is profit opportunity, then the white-glove service actually works AGAINST the goal (after all, they know that ultimately they are paying for the added service).

In my mind, the most important thing (to get back to the cow analogy) is to research what color your customer likes, and then paint your cow. Then, once you have painted your cow, don't paint it again. If the color of the cow keeps changing, your customer won't know what they are buying.

Take the time. Do the research. Pick out the color and paint that cow. With a little work, you can be remarkable.

Monday, December 22, 2008

I wonder...

It is an introspective day today. It is a day for wonder and contemplation. "what would happen if..." and "how can I...". How does one go about separating ones self from the pack? Purple Cow is a book about the importance of being remarkable - of spreading the word - if you are really good (and a bit lucky) maybe even attaining "idea virus" status. But how do you know? What is a differentiator in one person's mind, is going to be "same old same old" in another's.

So the solution is to focus your attention to the people who respond. Don't try to be everything to everyone right? But when you are starting, how do you know which people are the right people, and how do you get permission to talk to them?

No solutions today - just a lot more questions...

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

What's stopping you?

Or for that matter, what is stopping me? I think that for a lot of people, it is the same answer, so even though this isn't a "diary blog" I'm going to spend a bit of time examining what is stopping ME, and maybe you'll see something that you recognize. After all, we are all in this together.

Money: An easy place to start is money. "I just can't afford the expense of launching my idea and still eat and pay my mortgage." The experts will tell us that money is just one barrier to entry, and they are correct; but it can be a very real barrier to entry. Is there a way to continue to move forward without breaking the bank? This one, to me, gets back to "the next right thing to do." Can I work on a prototype? One of my ideas is fairly non-technical; so I could probably put the prototype together pretty easily. My problem is I find myself getting sucked into "then what." "So I build the prototype? So what? I still can't afford to launch it." Try to resist the urge to head too far down this path. Focus on the next right thing to do; also known as "we'll cross that bridge when we get to it." I think that you'll be amazed how far you can get before dollars become the obstacle.

FEAR!: Next for me (and this is probably the biggest one) is just plain fear. Fear of the financial ramifications of jumping; fear of the response that I will (or won't) get; fear of all of the stuff that can - and will - go awry. Isn't it interesting though that the thing that I gives me the greatest degree of anxiety is simply how my ideas and my actions will be viewed by other people. What if "they" think its stupid? This is the silliest darn thing that I've ever seen. That does not make it less real mind you - but how does a dis-interested third party's reaction have ANY bearing on me or my success? It doesn't. It is all about my own insecurities. That's all. Nothing more.


Technical Savvy: I have a lot of ideas...A LOT of them, and some of them might even be marketable. Problem is that I have no idea how to implement most of them -or even if they would work. I am not an engineer, I'm a sales guy. I look at my wife's and I see technical software that could help her differentiate. I don't know how to do it. I don't even know if its possible. That means that I have to find the people that DO know how to do it and if its possible - that leads back to fear. So I need to take a step back and once again focus on THE NEXT thing. Only that. Don't let the anxiety of what someone MIGHT say or do slow me down. Stop playing the scenarios in my head and talk to some people. Worst case is that they won't be interested. Big deal. Talk to someone else. Eventually you will find someone who is willing to help.

Time: Time is tough because it is such an easy trap to fall into. This blog is a great example. I haven't posted for almost a week. Have a been busy at work? Sure I have. But there have also been plenty of times in the last week that I have made an ALTERNATIVE CHOICE. That is what the "time" issue is about. It is about making choices. Sleeping in instead of working out. Watching TV instead of working on your blog. Time is real because it is finite. There really are only 24 hours in a day, and we really do need to sleep - as well as all of the other things that fill up our days. Just acknowledge that how you USE your time is a choice. Get up 1/2 hour earlier, or go to bed 1/2 later - just one half hour. Devote that time to working on "your thing." See what happens.

Ok, I'm getting a bit long-winded now, so I'm going to post, but stay tuned...

Monday, December 15, 2008

Dealing with "no"

Over the short life of this blog, I have been singing the praises of daring to do something amazing. Pursuing your great idea, or just daring to try something a little different. I realized that the implication of the last couple days may be seen as "just try - after that its easy." Not so much the case. Regardless of your dream, a lot of people will say "no."

Change is hard. The status quo will exert tremendous pressure to maintain itself. Some people will be very polite in their "no". Some will be condescending, as if to say "you just don't understand..." others will be just plain mean.

So how do you deal with the negativity and doubt that is thrown at you and your great idea? It is really easy to get sucked in, and to start believing that maybe that idea isn't so great after all. When that happens, it is a really good time to take a little reality check. Take some time. Take a step back and look at the feedback and your reaction to it. Are there some real issues that were brought up? If so, start working your way through them. Keep in mind that not all "negative" feedback is actually negative. I guarantee that there will be some rocks hidden just below the surface of even the best idea.

Keep in mind that "no" isn't about YOU. It may be about the idea, it may be about the audience's in-ability to wrap their heads around your idea - but it is NOT about you. You will have to work at keeping distance between "you" and the "no." Attaching the negative response to yourself creates a spiral that is really hard to get out of - all of the sudden it becomes about ME being wrong, or ME not being smart enough, or them not liking ME - and that is not it at all. Just keep firmly in mind that the issue may be either the idea or the audience, but it is never, ever about you personally.

Easier said than done, I know - BELIEVE me I know - but forge ahead. It will be worth the effort.

Friday, December 12, 2008

Defy Gravity!

There is a song in the musical Wicked (sung brilliantly by Tony award-winner Idina Menzel) called Defying Gravity. Elphaba (the future Wicked Witch of the West) finds herself unable to live with the constraints of convention in OZ. Elphaba sings:
"Something has changed within me. Something is not the same. I'm through with playing by the rules of someone else's game. Too late for second-guessing. Too late to go back to sleep! It's time to trust my instincts. Close my eyes, and leap! It's time to try defying gravity. I think I'll try defying gravity, and you can't pull me down"

Of course Glynda the Good (the incomparable Kristin Chenoweth) replies with:
"Can't I make you understand. You're having delusions of grandeur!"

I'm not going to turn this entry into a Wicked-fest, but I think that the lyrics of this song really strike a chord (literally as well as figuratively).

The power of convention can be overwhelming. Well meaning friends and family try to talk us back to earth. Don't reach to far. Don't stretch too much...you might fall.

Don't let them. Dare to dream - and dream big. Change starts with an idea. An idea that, by its very nature, defies convention. Change is, after all, different. It is not easy. It takes guts and conviction, you have to be willing to attempt that which has not been done.

The strength of your convictions and the courage to try. One more line from the song..."everyone deserves a chance to fly."

YOU deserve a chance to fly. You deserve to be happy and fulfilled and living the life that you've dreamed of.

Go for it.

Close your eyes...and leap.

Monday, December 8, 2008

Mark and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day

Do you remember "Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day?" by Judith Viorst? Well today I can relate. Among other things, I was late for a meeting this morning because of snow/traffic, and I think its entirely possible that I broke my toe at noon when I dropped a big glass bottle of milk on it...right on the edge of the bottle too. Those are just two of the highlights (or would they be low-lights). Nothing horrible or earth-shattering (toe shattering maybe - but still) just enought to make me crabby.

The topic for today is not my bad day. You can read a million (literally) blogs and posts about why somebody's day sucked. My challenge today is how to get out of it.

We all have crappy days. Sometimes for good reasons, sometimes for no reason at all - but here is the big question - how do you get past it? How do you set about turning your day around, not by chance or fate, but by intention?

Sometimes you can just forget about it and move on - other days just seem plagued (today would fit that description). I have mentioned my mentor - the late Bill Sauer - in this blog before, and days like today remind me of him. Bill's advice to me would be to just observe how I am feeling and what it happening, not to label it as "good" or "bad" but just as "is". He used to say "rocks are hard, water is wet" it is not something to dwell upon - it just is.

Perhaps a "bad" day can be viewed through the same lens. What if we were able to view a bad day as a day - neither good nor bad, but rather part of the experience that makes us who we are. I think that it is entirely possible to not "allow" yourself a bad day - to push through it and ignore the fact that you are off or cranky, but I also think that if you simply dismiss how you are feeling that you miss an opportunity.

I'm not suggesting that you wallow in self pity, or partake in wanton crabbiness, biting the heads off of friends, family or co-workers - not at all. Rather, what I am advocating here is an observational self-awareness. The process of watching my moods and thoughts as though I am a disinterested third party. Imagine yourself floating above yourself and just watching, without judgment. Merely being in a state of awareness of thought, feelings and moods. Step back for a moment and say to yourself "boy, that seems to have struck a nerve. Interesting." Notice it, and then let it go. You can gain some great insights on your "triggers" and, at the same time, diffuse the emotion of the event.

Interestingly, I am having a better day already - even if my toe still hurts.

Sunday, December 7, 2008

Happiness

According to the cast of the original "You're a Good Man Charlie Brown", happiness is many things including: pizza with sausage, telling the time, having a sister and walking hand in hand - just to name a few. Happiness is a lot of things to a lot of people, and now researchers at Harvard have proven one more thing...it's contagious.

Now I'm really not sure how groundbreaking an idea this is - personal experience tells us that when we are around happy people, we are happier. Now Naomi Krasge of Bloomberg News has reported on a Harvard study that proves it. Happy Despite it All? brings up some interesting points.

According to the research, happiness can actually ripple through social networks, up to three degrees of separation - that means you know somebody who knows somebody, who knows somebody.

Other items of note:
"A person is 25% more likely to be happy after a shift toward happiness in a friend who lives within 1 mile" and "Happy next-door neighbors made it 34% more probable that a person would feel good"

The study assessed 4700 people over 20 years.

Kinda cool stuff.

There are 2 morals to the story for me:
1. Focus on being happy. It is not only a benefit to YOU but to your friends, neighbors and loved-ones -and THEIR family, friends and loved ones.
2. Find happy people. Hang out with them. A lot. It will help your attitude and disposition and lead you toward happiness - which leads us back to point #1.

Check out the article, have a great weekend, and in the words of Bobby McFerrin "don't worry, be happy"

Thursday, December 4, 2008

Playing the Bell

The Bell Curve. We all know it. For many of us, the last time we heard about the bell curve was when we got that "c" on the test and had to explain it to our parents..."well, he graded it on a curve so it wasn't really that bad." But the simple fact is that the curve reigns. The "standard distribution of the population" simply states that most people are in the middle. Its true of IQ, its true of technological savvy, it is true of political leanings. In every case, you have the outliers - those people who make up the small percentage at either end, and then a majority of people in what we call "normal."
Here is the interesting thing about the standard bell curve: You can move it. Seriously. You can shift the entire world of "normal." Malcom Gladwell called it "The Tipping Point." Here is how I see it working, and how it can be influenced.

Basically, any new idea or product - I mean REALLY new idea - starts at the far right side of the curve. In high-tech, they are typically called "early adapters" but they are the innovators. The first ones to pick up an idea and run with it. If you are out on the edges - people look at you a bit differently. They may even call you (god forbid) weird. But here's the thing...if you hang on tight and work to build the base of "believers" in your idea or product, well something happens. Weird becomes less weird. Think back about 10 years ago. Think about how you looked at someone with body art or piercing...pretty out-there wasn't it? Now? Not so much. So what happened? Quite simply, the bell curve moved. The outliers ceased to become outliers. They became the norm - or at least MORE normal. The entire curve shifted toward body art. Now I'm not saying that everyone is running out to get pierced, but the attitude toward the practice has shifted. Even if you don't LIKE it, it isn't deviant (in the good sense of the word) anymore.

So what does that mean for you? Essentially it means that you can change the world. Start small. Build a band of followers (that which Seth Godin calls a Tribe - you really need to read that book) if you can hang on tightly enough and build enough excitement, eventually the entire curve will spring to the right. "Normal" will shift. It takes an idea and the courage to talk about it, but that is where it starts. Toyota shifted the curve with the Prius. Al Gore shifted the curve with "An Inconvenient Truth" Granted they had some horse-power behind them, but it doesn't have to happen that way.

YOU can create a movement. You can make a difference. If it is global climate, clean air, body art, jazz, whatever you are nuts about - it can happen. It DOES happen. Every day.

Believe it. Believe in youself.

What have you got to loose?

Tuesday, December 2, 2008

In Defense of Weird

First of all let me say absolutely and unequivocally that I am weird. I always have been - just ask my wife, or my dad, or my sister - they'll all say the same thing. So I fully admit my bias toward weird. But here's the thing, most of the people who accomplish anything truly remarkable are, in fact, a little weird. Maybe we call it "eccentric" or "outlandish" but it all boils down to the same thing. Richard Branson? Weird. Bill Gates? Weird. Seth Godin? VERY weird. These are people that dared to challenge convention. I would guess that none of them really care too much about what other people say about them - and by a lot of standards, that is just plain weird.

Don't play by the accepted rules. Don't do things just because it has always been done. Challenge it. Fly in the face of it. Dance in the streets if you feel like it. Sing out loud in a crowded shopping mall - If you let other people define you, it is self-limiting and self destructive. Allow yourself to express yourself. Whether it be in writing, drawing, painting or, god forbid, launching a new product, starting a new company or just looking at your job in a different way and finding ways to bring the fun back. People who are having fun are a lot more productive - and THEY ARE HAVING FUN.

Weird is creative. Weird is off the beaten path. Ultimately the people who think you are a little bit weird are probably so afraid of defying convention that they don't even know how to react. Let me let you in on a little secret. The conventional rules don't apply anymore. "Good enough" isn't. The ways that society has defined us ARE NOT going to get us to where we need to go. Not econimically, not environmentally. We are going to have to start looking through a different lense - and that, my friend, will be seen as weird.

I can't define "it" for you. I don't know what your boundaries are. Or what your dreams are. I can tell you this: Whatever "it" is...go for it. You owe it to yourself.

For heaven's sake, don't let a little thing like being weird slow you down.